Jimmy Beh

My friend, Drew, has a deep love for one-liners. No, not the joking one-liners, I mean one-liner mantras. Some are of his own making, some are shared with others from various trips, and some are just quotes. All of them, though, could probably be boiled down to one phrase he uses frequently; “Don’t Hesitate.”

Besides reciting this mantra and putting it on some of his nonprofits apparel (The Dawgpatch Bandits), he has allowed it to seep into his philosophy on life. So much so, a couple months back he sent me a picture of him proposing to his now fiancee– the caption simply said, “Don’t Hesitate.” Perfect.

But like all mantras, they are not there to just keep us at peak intensity. They are also what we must cling to in times of struggle and discomfort. They serve as guiding wisdom when we cannot see where our path leads. Our verbal north star.

There is a rather unique quality to this. You see, it requires action and discipline to move forward on our path, and, yet, we do not achieve our goals or find our way from simply doing. Dr. Joseph Campbell, the late and great professor of mythology, said, “if the path before you is clear, you are probably on someone else’s.” In this way, we move forward on our journey through the ebb and flow of action and surrender. 

But how do we know when to act and when to let go? Another good friend of mine refers to this figuring out process as “having your antenna up.” Our antennas receive information from all over. Our internal intuition, our experiences, our relationship with the Divine, and our relationships with our friends and our family. While we may be the one that has to make the decisions, we must remember we are part of a larger community that helps us make sense of where we are and where we are headed. We then take all this information in and we discern where it is calling us to next. 

As far as I can tell, discerning where we are called is something we do throughout our lives. And it is that discipline of living with our antenna’s up, even when it is uncomfortable and hard, that creates an openness in our life to deeper meaning and joy. 

We are all at different stages of adjusting our antenna’s. Some of us, like myself, have the IT department on speed dial because he cannot quite figure out how to keep a good signal. Others may be reading the information loud and clear, but are lacking the confidence or self- efficacy to take action. Whatever our shortcomings or hesitations might be, we are invited to work through it as we become more aware of it. In this way, we recognize our hesitation as an important point of entry rather than something to simply avoid.

Additionally, when we use the mantra, “Don’t Hesitate,” we are not trying to embrace a lifestyle that is merely impulsive. Rather, we are trying to embrace a way of living that is radically open to life. Richard Rohr wrote, “Life isn’t about me, I’m about life.” It must become less about what I can get out of life and more about where life is calling me. Thrills are usually off in the distance over the next hill, but joy is right now. It does not mean joy cannot be over the hill, but if you don’t find it here and now you probably won’t find it over the hill. (You can trust me on this one– I’ve checked a lot of hills in the past 30 years).

I think most of my friends and family would agree that I have no problem taking risks and seeking thrills. But as I try to live with my own antenna up, I am beginning to see that taking risks is not the same thing as being open or even vulnerable to life. 

This is where Mary Oliver’s poem entitled (you guessed it) “Don’t Hesitate” has recently struck me:

“If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be. We are not wise, and not very often kind. And much can never be redeemed. Still life has some possibility left. Perhaps this is its way of fighting back, that sometimes something happened better than all the riches or power in the world. It could be anything, but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.”

“Don’t be afraid of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.”

Joy and life are not crumbs we must scrap together, instead they are banquets that we are each invited to. We must decide how we want to respond to their invitation. And, if we find ourselves hesitating, we can recite Drew’s mantra; “Don’t Hesitate,” and work to adjust our antenna.